surviving in spite of myself

the sun is sneaking between the clouds today.  i'm sitting in my jammies in the living room enjoying the sun streaking through the cranberry color of the drapery and reflected off the plants.  the little dogs are all napping in a spot of sunshine.  if there was a spot big enough for me i'd do it too.  i'm getting around better but every day is new and i just never know how i'll feel from morning till evening.  i start physical therapy in a couple of days so that should be interesting.  in addition to the healing of my back surgery i developed tendenitis in my right wrist.  of course i'm right handed.  surprisingly the pain meds i take for my back do not dampen the pain in the wrist so i broke down and went to another doctor's appt.  now i could barely move my thumb and could not press down on the side of my wrist without a little scream........the screaming and whimpering going on that could probably be heard in the lobby as the doctor moved my thumb around and pushed on the wrist was from me.  he hurt me!!  and, lucky me, the treatment for this is a cortizone shot in the wrist.  i've been shot up in my knee and spine, i figure this will be a breeze.  did i mention the screaming and crying........keep breathing, don't pass out.  and i didn't even get a cute bandaid.  it does feel a little better today and i don't scream out loud when i move my thumb so that's a good thing and he said it would be better in a couple of days.  thank heavens there's some pain relief out there for soemthing.  cling to that little stuff.

i knew my back surgery recovery would take a long time and i would be at home for longer than i can remember.  hence, the updating of the household decor and arrangement.  i knew in advance i would need to comfort of my surroundings.   and i seem to think i can take on projects, after all, i'm at home with nothing to do.  but i find recovery takes alot outta me.  i'm generally tired and wear out easily.  i get up feeling pretty good and think i can putz around the house doing stuff.  my back doesn't like that much and lets me know pretty quickly.  this annoys me.  the hardness thing for me to do is rest.  so i'm going to sit here and watching the sun drift in and out of the clouds, listen to the windchimes tinkling out on the porch and pet a little dog